−Pieces of Ordinary Life−

Four years have passed since my AD desperately prevented me doing my things.

My schedules at that time was...

I got up, went bathing at once to ease my skin and rested at bed during the morning. After late lunch I left my bed, then needed about one hour till itchy sensation was settled.

Although my condition was still serious as such, now I became to be able to do some of houseworks afterwards, like cooking, washing dishes, and so on.

After 3 p.m. was my time. I barely had the least power to read, think and talk then. So I was ready for negotiations which required somewhat concentration.

The acute problem of my family at the moment was rebuiding our old house.
I launched it.

For Allergic people like us, building a new house was very risky in modern Japan.
Because since about 1980's, building materials had rapidly changed from traditional wood, clays and papers to artifitial chemicals.

Chemicals were known to reduce our immunological capacity and exaggerate allergic symptoms. They might also break out complicating multiple chemical sensitivity(MCS).

In Japan, MCS was first known as "sick house syndrome".
I knew various cases of MCS who could not stay in their own house.

So I had to be very cautious.

I checked lots of contruction companies.
Though almost all of big companies' house were very good in design and price, I couldn't find enough consideration for the risk of chemicals' harmful effects in any of them.
So were most of local contruction offices.

I finally found a unique office group.
The name was "OM solar system". O is for Japanese word "omoshiroi" which means interesting, and M is for "mottainai" which means not to be wasteful.

Their concept was to use full value of natural energy.
They were a complex of offices, not a company, therefore local contructors who know local climate well could plan actual construction.

They used mainly woods and excruded any decorative wallpapars or paints (extremely rare way in Japan now), which was most attractive for me.

I told them my sensitivity to chemicals.
They selected more natural items and frequently showed me real samples.
The process was important. Allegy and sensitivity were varied in individuals. I had to choose materials I could accept.

Moreover, even natural woods radiated hormaldehyde.
They opened the house every day during construction to volatilize residual chemicals as possible before residency.

So the contruction took 5 months for plannnig and 6 months for building.
The periods were quite long in recent Japan, but I thought we should rather feel houses/condominiumus made in only a few months unusual.

Another my new duties were nursing of my mother and housekeeping instead of her.

That was because my mother got sick just as she took over me.
She had been doing all the care of me and my daughter for years, since I had fallen into heavy sickness, until my small daughter graduated the kindergarten.

I guessed she used up her power for us.
I felt so sorry for her.

She was diagnosed as fatal multiple liver cancer.
Her residual life was limited.
She was in hospital till ascites was removed and other symptoms were improved. Then she came back home because she wanted to live her rest of life in her house, so did I.

That spring, my daughter entered elementary school.
At the first entrance ceremony day, as she was just a 6 year-old child, somebody had to take her to school.
But I couldn't do it.

I begged my sister to take a day off, and accompany her to school.

In such time, I couldn't help feeling inability and inefficacy of myself.

I couldn't carry out my duty.
I felt myself to be only a troublesome burden.
Why did I have to live in such miserable condition?
Was it guilt to be sick?

Parhaps, it was not proper to think in such way.
Men were to live while their life last, even if they could do or couldn't do anything.

My daughter looked happy, full of expectation of new life, nevertheless her AD(locations of eruptions were mainly neck, flexional sides of elbow, knee, sometimes face) and allergic rhinitis were still there.
She was my hope.

I prepared meal every day.
Now I could barely cook. I was grateful for the recovery so that I could somewhat repay my mother's favor.
However, it was a hard work for me. Eczematous hand skin exaggerated by kitchen work. Cooking consumed most of my active time of days.

Now my mother could not go out.
She could not eat indigestive food.
Sometimes her condition went down and she had to stay in hospital about 7 days or so.
I took her, visited her and got her back by car.

Unstable my skin did not permit me to go far or long.
My territory was within my city.
But now I could lead a mininum social life there.

I felt a sense of fulfillment of doing meaningful things compared to my past bedridden idle days.
But I knew the past days were not meaningless as well.

Life had various seasons.
The sum of them was present me.

The busy life led me to a little aggravating episodes.
Diarrhea, irritability of colon, impetigo in summer, strong itchy sensation, malaise in winter...
But I could manage them by retiring to bed early every day.
Along big waves and small waves, my body was recovering slowly and steadily.

The most dreamy event during those days was the gala of shichi-go-san(7-5-3).
It was to celeblate children's healthy grouth at three, seven for girls and five for boys. My daughter was seven by counting in the old Japanese way (1 year at birth, add a year at every new year's day).

We family got dressed and went cheerfully to a nearby photo stadio.
Even my mother went out together for the special day.
I also cared about my appearance after a long time. I wore a designed velvet black pants suit and rouged.

I had hated to be photographed when my face had been ugly because of AD.
And I had been unable to enjoy daily joyful events of ordinary people because of AD.

Now I was partially back.

My daughter was very beautiful.
We were Happy.

I thought the tip of long time recuperarion life of giving up steroids(symptom covering therapy) was maybe "the planning of timing".
Balancing unhealthy body not to miss big events or important times of life was great points for success.

......Six years and two months have passed since the aggravation.

to next chapter:ABLE TO GO TO TOKYO
to previous chapter:GOING OUT

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