It had been three years since I had got unable to go out.
My bathing barely decreased from 2 to 1 times a day.
Still morning bathing was essential for me because it reduced pain and itch of my irritable skin which had been damaged after long night scratch.
Slowly I became to go out daily.
The frequency was about 1 times during 10 days in that spring.
I went to dentist, restaurants or some shops of daily goods. Now I could have enough consentration to forget itch or pain, give attention to other things and act like ordinary healthy people for a while.
It was dreamy for me after such long desperate time.
I thanked my family who had supported me so much, and felt happy to have good times with that family members.
This must be the first step back to ordinary life, although it still would be distant.
I thought I was rewarded with the days I had been bearing.
If in the evening I could take my daughter out to play in that summer.
I felt rather itchy with sweating, but I could enjoy with her.
It had been quite long since we last went for recreation.
I couldn't say a word wearily when I get back home.
Moreover, after we enjoyed our local summer festibal,
we two had impetigo.
A decline of immunologic function due to weariness would be the cause of infection.
I felt this was a step of the process going up and down during recovering chronic diseases.
(Local infections I had during these process were;
multiple folliculitis: at late times of hot spring therapy,
multiple pustules of palms and fingers: at the end of that,
impetigo: this time,
pustules of an ankle: at that winter,
pustules of an arm: at the next summer.
Pustuls were probably staphyrococcal infections. Luckily I have no expirience of Kaposi's herpetiform infection (due to herpe virus) .)
Then I bought a car to go farther.
Soon I knew my driving technic was not lost. Body memory is enduring.
A car was very useful.
Even if my legs' skin was so hurt that I couldn't bearly stand or walk, I could sit in the car, drive, and move. I could walk when I reached at the destination, because wounds were dried in crusts till then.
It helped my disabled body to behave more active.
Besides, as scratching in public was embarrassing, privately-owned car was more preferable. I might scratch during driving without being stared at.
It took more than 3 additional years for me to be able to move by train.
But driving a car was an experience to find my irritability to chemicals as well.
To my astonishing, I felt the smell of new car intolerablly uncomfortable.
That was my first scense throughout my all car life.
The smell presumably came from plastics of inner space. That meant I got some kind of irritability to chemicals.
It suggested that I caught the irritability somewhere I expused to them. Maybe it started when my AD aggravated tremendously in brand-new condominium.
AD and chemikal hypersensitivity had something to do.
Soon after using the car, my daughter started to say that her face shiver when she got in the car.
We both were weak in the inner smell of cars and used to get carsick in small childs. We might originally had tendancy to catch such irritability.
I'm afraid she might be worse not to be able to use cars someday.
That would be so serious that her ordinal social life would be broken then.
We cannot live without chemicals in contemporary society.
I think we should control the use of chemicals not to increase people who get hypersensitivity to chemical, but economy often has priority.
My body was very weak still because of low activity.
At summer holidays, my aunt came to help us and I spend sit almost all day for several days.
After she left, when I ate some spicy food, I felt sudded dizziness. My heart beated rapidly, respiratory rate increased and I was in a cold sweat.
The function of my autonomic reguration of blood pressure was still so poor.
In November, when I quit using showerhead which had filters of removing chlorine (for disinfection) because of vanishing of changing filter, the dryness of my skin progressed on and on.
I had to search and buy another showerhead in a flurry.
My skin could not overcome the influence of chlorine yet.
In December, again I could not go out of home due to remarkable dryness, pain and itch in winter climate.
I went to bed early and got rest solely every day. Even talking with a friend on telephone was too hard to do then.
In January, when I ate processed box lunch in new year celebration, I felt dreadful itch and ran to bed.
The box was made of new styrene foam, smelled chemical.
The color of foods were too vivid, the taste were somewhat strange. Maybe they contained much artificial additives.
My body perceived them.
How sensitive was I! I sighed I had to pay close attention to what I eat.
Cars, houses, sterilisers, containers, foods.....
More than 100 thousands of chenicals sorrounds us.
They influence us as one simple substance or as the sums.
They might do harm not only to peoples of obious chemical senseitivity, but AD ones, or other numerous people.
Our environment is dangerous.
But it's a consideration of our convenient life.
We have to take it to heart.